Does life always seem to get
the upper hand on you? Do you feel very frustrated much of the time? If so
there are ways to help you take charge of your anger.
Sometimes we experience a
knee-jerk reaction and don't have a pause to reflect before acting. The pause is very important as we can evaluate things and
reactions instead of buying into them. When we
buy into them we convince ourselves of their truth and don't have room to question our perceptions. We need to
take a pause and look at the reaction rather than just have the first impulsive response that comes to us (which
generally is very unconscious).
Anger management doesn't just apply to domestic violence, road rage and postal workers having a bad day. It is
something that can be used in daily life even for those small irritating scenarios. For instance, a friend may be
late in meeting you. Do you start having thoughts revolving in your head that you are being slighted, taken for granted
etc? It is good to give the person the benefit of the doubt when they arrive. Do they have a legitimate reason? Do they
have a pattern of being late and making you wait? We all are subject to delays due to traffic, a boss asking to see us
after work or a home situation crisis. Even if your friend repeatedly it late, you can best communicate to them by
being assertive rather than angry . For instance, tell them that you feel you are being taken advantage of and give
examples of their tardiness with you using past examples. Stay calm but be clear when you speak. This is much more
effective than yelling in anger.
In addition to communication, using simple breathing techniques can clear your mind and allow you to approach
the situation without being impulsive. Breathing helps to keep the mind centered and focused and this will allow you
to compose your words carefully. The point isn't to let
someone treat you poorly, but to first listen and hear them out. If it seems that there is an ongoing pattern where you
are treated by the other person without respect, then you need to speak out appropriately. On the otherhand, if the
situation is one where the person is late or has a valid reason for their behavior then try to be understanding and
treat them how you'd like to be treated in a similar situation.
Note: Some statements in this article may not be
approved by the FDA. This article is for informational purposes only and
should not be taken as professional medical advice.